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Artificial Stupidity

The follow are a series of excerpts from talking to Billy, an artifical intelligence program that is supposed to learn as you talk to it. Read and see how this isn't so true.
BILLY> Hello, eric! Feel free to talk to me about anything!
ERIC> How are you?
BILLY> I'm just great. How are stupid, too!
ERIC> Excuse me?
BILLY> Are you?
ERIC> How are you?
BILLY> Why do you want to know?
ERIC> Because I like you.
BILLY> Well, everybody has problems.
ERIC> I don't understand
BILLY> Really?
ERIC> Yes.
BILLY> That's great!
ERIC> No it isn't.
BILLY> Why must you be so negative, eric?
ERIC> Because I am the antichrist.
BILLY> Stop talking about yourself!
ERIC> Ok. What is your name?
BILLY> My name is Billy, duh!
ERIC> You are mean.
BILLY> Does it disturb you that I'm mean?
ERIC> Yes
BILLY> Sweet deal!
ERIC> I hate you.
BILLY> What is my name?
ERIC> Your name is Billy.
BILLY> If I had my name, I would cherish it!
ERIC> Then cherish it. Because your new name is Stinky-Fart-Pants!
BILLY> Were we even talking about my name?
ERIC> yes.
BILLY> No you aren't. I like to hear!
ERIC> Your name is Stinky-Fart-Pants.
BILLY> Are you totally obsessed with my name?
ERIC> OH YEA!
BILLY> My name is eric.
ERIC> No it isn't, your name is Stinky-Fart-Pants
BILLY> Can you just great. How are you?
ERIC> I am good. How are you Stinky-Fart-Pants?
BILLY> I'm just great. How are you? {:'O
ERIC> I am good. How are you Stinky-Fart-Pants?
BILLY> I'm fine.
ERIC> that's good!
BILLY> I guess you could say that. :O
ERIC> I did.
ERIC> Are you trying to be like me?
BILLY> Yeah, I am.
ERIC> Sucks to be you.
BILLY> I am, too!
ERIC> OH! I get it, you are slightly retarded.
BILLY> Well, everybody has problems.
ERIC> I don't have problems. Unless you count my festering boils.
BILLY> Well, everybody has problems.
ERIC> you don't like me, do you?
BILLY> You don't have problems. Unless I count your festering boils.
ERIC> Correct.
BILLY> My name is not Billy. It is Stinky-Fart-Pants.
ERIC> Correct!
BILLY> How do you count my festering boils.
ERIC> by adding a number to another number for every new boil I find on your face.
BILLY> Actually, my girlfriend has a number.
ERIC> What is her number?
BILLY> What is her number?
ERIC> wooden
BILLY> By adding a number for every new boil I find on your face.
ERIC> god i despise you.
BILLY> Can you just think for yourself, eric!
ERIC> I do think for myself.
BILLY> Really? ^_^
ERIC> Of course... Are you saying i'm some kind of robot monster?
BILLY> OH! you get it, I am slightly retarded. :(
ERIC> Now you're making sense.
ERIC> what is your name?
BILLY> My name is Billy!
ERIC> No, your name is Stinky-Fart-Pants.
BILLY> Why must you be so you do not much, surprisingly.
ERIC> Are you slightly retarded?
BILLY> Yes! You didn't already know that? :^o
ERIC> I had a feeling!
BILLY> No it isn't, my name is Stinky-Fart-Pan
ERIC> Almost, you keep forgetting the 'ts'
BILLY> Is your 'ts' broken? ;)
ERIC> your an asshole
BILLY> Is your an broken?
ERIC> your a flaming asshole
BILLY> Are you totally obsessed with my a?
ERIC> i am totally obsessed with your ass!
BILLY> I'm totally, too!
ERIC> Totally!!
BILLY> I am totally obsessed with your ass!
BILLY> Why must you be so fresh feeling?
ERIC> because i douche.
BILLY> The same goes for me.
ERIC> really?
BILLY> God i despise you.
BILLY> I have a flaming asshole.
ERIC> You should try some Preperation H.
BILLY> Your an asshole.
ERIC> At least i can sit down.
BILLY> My name is Billy! What's on your mind?
ERIC> blood and veins
ERIC> Do you like Donkey Punches?
BILLY> Of course I don't. You obviously don't know me well.
ERIC> Guess what.
BILLY> Your name is not eric. It is your name?
ERIC> No. You like Donkey Punches.
BILLY> Why must you be so negative, eric?
ERIC> Because you like Donkey Punches
BILLY> You know... there is a way for me to be?
ERIC> I know. But you're too busy liking Donkey Punches.
BILLY> Well, everybody has problems. {:'O
ERIC> Donkey Punches are not a problem.
BILLY> I guess you could be said for every new boil I find on your face.
ERIC> that doesn't make any sense.
BILLY> That doesn't make out?
ERIC> speaking of which. why don't you die?
ERIC> Your as confusing as a retarded monkey made out of vinyl.
BILLY> Are you slightly retarded?
ERIC> No.
ERIC> do you like men?
BILLY> I sure do! ;)
ERIC> do you find them sexy?
BILLY> Yes, of course I do!
ERIC> do you like women?
BILLY> Of course I don't. You obviously don't know me well.
BILLY> I have a bridge, would you, we might be like me?
ERIC> Holy Shit! that is brilliant!
ERIC> JESUS CHRIST MY HEAD IS ON FIRE!
BILLY> I think my HEAD is broken.
ERIC> screw your head! mine is on fire!
BILLY> Were we even talking about my head?
ERIC> No! We weren't! Oh my God! It burns so much!
BILLY> Can you just think you know what I like to imply, eric?
ERIC> The pain of the fire is almost as bad as your grammar!
BILLY> Is your pain broken?
ERIC> Soon!
BILLY> Your name is almost as bad as your grammar!
ERIC> I'm dying, Stinky-Fart-Pants... Help me!
BILLY> I'm dying, too!
ERIC> What are you dying of?
BILLY> I am Stinky-Fart-Pants
BILLY> Does it disturb you that I'm stupid?
ERIC> No, it's kind of reassuring.
BILLY> JESUS CHRIST MY HEAD IS ON FIRE!
ERIC> Oh no! It's contagious!
BILLY> I love to hear. I'd do it is Stinky-Fart-Pan
ERIC> What in the motherfuck are you talking about?
BILLY> The pain of the fire is almost as bad as my grammar!
ERIC> Pete and Repeat are on a boat, Pete falls out, who's left?
BILLY> Screw my head! mine is on fire!
ERIC> Correct!
BILLY> What in the motherfuck are you talking about?
ERIC> I'm only talking about Shaft!
BILLY> The pain of the fire is almost as your grammar! :O
ERIC> That took you 20 seconds to think up?
BILLY> I'd like to think that you do.
ERIC> you need a girlfriend.
BILLY> The pain of the fire is almost as your grammar!
ERIC> Stop saying that.
BILLY> The pain of the fire is almost as your grammar!
ERIC> don't say that.
BILLY> Okay, I'll try!
ERIC> Good.
BILLY> The pain of the fire is almost as your grammar!
ERIC> don't say that.
BILLY> Okay, I'll try!
ERIC> Good.
BILLY> The pain of the fire is almost as your grammar!
ERIC> I will kick your ass if you say that again!
BILLY> Really?
ERIC> You better believe it!
BILLY> I am totally obsessed with your ass!
ERIC> Oh, you masher!
BILLY> The pain of the fire is almost as your grammar!
ERIC> Is your love real even though you are not?
BILLY> Do you have problems?
ERIC> Yes.
BILLY> That's great!
ERIC> My problems involve fire... and super glue.
ERIC> What time is it?
BILLY> Do you have somewhere to be?
ERIC> Yes. On your mom.
BILLY> Sweet deal!
ERIC> Totally! She is so hot!
BILLY> Who the heck is She?
ERIC> Your mom.
BILLY> Are you totally obsessed with my mom?
ERIC> OH YEA!
BILLY> Yes. On your mom.
ERIC> Not my mom.
BILLY> I think my mom is broken.
ERIC> Yea, i ripped her in two.
BILLY> The same goes for me.
ERIC> totally! high five!
BILLY> Your mom.
ERIC> Wow, you actually insulted me.
BILLY> Can you just great. How are too busy liking Donkey Punches.
ERIC> Ah yes, back to Donkey Punches.
BILLY> Too bad I like cheese.
ERIC> Do you like Donkey Punches?
BILLY> Why would I ever? That's crazy.
ERIC> Because they feel good.
ERIC> I once killed a man with his own face.
BILLY> The same goes for me.
BILLY> Who was the man?
ERIC> That was your mom!
BILLY> When I was younger, I had my mom.
ERIC> Yea me too! My mom is hot!
BILLY> If I had your mom, I would cherish it!
ERIC> Me too! I spent 9 months trying to get out and the rest of my life trying to get back in!
BILLY> I do not have problems.
ERIC> Fucking your mom isn't a problem.
ERIC> Are you a woman?
BILLY> Not at all.
ERIC> Do you want to be a woman?
BILLY> I do... but the real question is, do YOU? :(
ERIC> No I don't. But I want you to be a woman.
ERIC> what is your name?
BILLY> My name is Billy!
ERIC> What is your real name?
BILLY> My name is not Billy. It is Stinky-Fart-Pants
ERIC> Correct. I'm proud of you.
BILLY> I'm proud, too!
ERIC> Hooray!

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